Try not to be too good in life
“Hi.”
“Hi.”
“How is everything going on?”
“Not so good.’
“So what happened?”
“Divorced.”
Waking up after the nap, I sat aimlessly on the bed yesterday. I turned on the TV, but no interesting program. My wife and daughter were still asleep. How I wished I could have a better sleep. I could sleep no longer than 20 minutes at noon
. No better choice, so I turned on the computer and signed in my qq. I found one
of my old friends, who I hadn’t seen for quite a few years, and started our conversation.
Married, divorce, it seems quite common things these years. So I was not quite surprised on hearing the news. Hesitated for a few seconds, I went on. “What happened?” “He was just too crazy about the Internet. He went to net bars as often as possible; sometimes he might stay in a net bar for a whole night.” I was a
bit surprised, as I know her husband is a teacher too. “What did he go there for, pc games or anything else?” “I’ve no idea.” “Have you ever talked with
him?” “No. I have ever suggested him not to do so, but it doesn’t work.” Paused for a while, she went on. “Last time when he didn’t come back the whole night again, I asked him why. He said he felt great pressure and he felt as if the
home was just a prison. So I said I would let him be free and so all had come to an end.”
I didn’t know what to say, so both of us kept silent for a few minutes. Then she said: “I had never thought that he would leave me, he was a common man, not good looking, not successful, and no special ability. That’s why I chose him to
be my husband; I thought I would be safe. We loved each other after we got married, and I have tried my best to be a good wife.”
“We borrowed some money for the wedding, and our salary is not so high. We ordered two bags of milk every day, he was too thin, and so I ask him to drink one bag in the morning, and the other in the evening. I feel much better to see him drink the milk than I drink it myself.”
“As a Chinese teacher, he had to go to work at 7 every morning; I went to work
at eight. But I got up at 6 every morning and got the breakfast ready, and then
I woke him up. He always complained it was such a terrible thing to go to work at 7, and how he wished he could go to work at 8 one day. I said to him that thought I went to work at 8, but I got up earlier than you, and cooked the breakfast
for you, I had never complained, so please don’t complain any more.”
After she told her story, I said to her: “I don’t want to say anything about your divorce, and since I am not your husband’s friend, I have no right to make
any comments on him, and I am not willing to do so. You are a good and kind woman, but I shall say, you are not a good wife.” I guessed she was crying, but I went on, “If you want to marry again, I think you’d better change yourself. You
said you felt much better and happier to see him drink the milk, than you drink
it yourself, right?” “Yes, though I like to drink milk.” “But have you ever
taken his feeling into consideration?” “Nope” “I think he didn’t feel so good when drinking the milk, he was drinking the burden.” “And when he complained about his work, I think he preferred that you could sleep by his side and complain the school than the ready breakfast you prepared for him, though what you
said is right, but I don’t think that’s not the words for husbands and wives.”
“You have done well, but you are just too good. You are so selfless, that makes
you too selfish. Because you take over all the rights to take care, and leave the burden to the other, he just had no chance to show his generosity, his love.
Love doesn’t mean receive, it doesn’t mean give only, either, it means to share, to share all, the happiness, and the sadness. If you do in your way, it has just two kinds of result: the first, give him great pressure, and the second, spoil him.”
“Too, to a greater extent than is desirable, permissible, or possible for a specified or understood purpose.” I just looked up the dictionary, and that’s the
explanation for the word “too”.
So, please don’t be too good in your life.
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